Ask your kid(s) these 2 questions:
1. What’s the most wonderful thing that’s every happen to you?
2. What’s the most horrible thing that’s ever happened to you?
There’s something to be gained from the first question, but it’s truly just the warm up for the second question. Don’t make the first question fee to much like a game, otherwise your kids will probably laugh off the second question. Ask them, and nod and show genuine interest. Get them to know you’re truly listening before you ask the second question.
My hope is you won’t learn anything devastating, but if there’s something to learn, then better soon than later.